Narcissists cheat because they crave constant validation, excitement, and control to boost their fragile self-esteem. They seek out new partners to feel desirable and powerful, often using infidelity to reinforce their sense of superiority. This behavior also helps them escape insecurities and maintain dominance over others. If you want to understand how these motives drive their actions and what really lies beneath their cheating, keep exploring the full reasons behind their behavior.
Key Takeaways
- Narcissists cheat to validate their desirability and boost self-esteem through external validation and admiration.
- They seek novelty to maintain excitement, inflate their ego, and demonstrate ongoing power and attractiveness.
- Infidelity serves as a form of emotional manipulation, allowing control and reinforcement of dominance over their partner.
- Cheating fulfills their insatiable need for supply—attention, admiration, and validation—making them feel important.
- Narcissists use betrayal to reinforce their sense of superiority, control, and to mask underlying insecurities.

Narcissists often cheat because they prioritize their own needs and desires over others’, and they rarely feel guilty about betraying trust. When you’re dealing with a narcissist, it’s essential to understand that their actions stem from a deep need for emotional manipulation and self image maintenance. They see relationships as opportunities to reinforce their sense of superiority and control, often using infidelity as a way to validate their desirability and power. Cheating becomes a tool to gain the supply they crave—attention, admiration, and validation—without regard for the emotional consequences inflicted on their partners.
For narcissists, emotional manipulation is a core tactic. They may subtly undermine your confidence or guilt-trip you to justify their betrayal, positioning themselves as the victim or martyr. They excel at twisting situations to make it seem like they’re entitled to what they want, often dismissing your feelings or concerns as unnecessary or insecure. This manipulation keeps you confused and emotionally drained, making it easier for them to pursue new sources of validation without facing guilt or remorse. Their focus on self image maintenance drives them to constantly project strength and attractiveness, which they believe is essential to uphold their status both socially and within the relationship.
Cheating feeds into their desire for novelty and excitement, which helps momentarily boost their self-esteem. Narcissists often view infidelity as a way to demonstrate their desirability and power, reaffirming their belief that they’re special and above the rules. They chase new partners or encounters not just for physical gratification but to keep their ego inflated. This constant pursuit of novelty allows them to escape feelings of emptiness or inadequacy that might threaten their carefully curated self-image. They may rationalize their cheating by convincing themselves that their partner isn’t enough or that they deserve more, making it easier to justify betrayal without internal conflict. Understanding the psychology of manipulation can help victims recognize the patterns and motives behind such behavior.
Ultimately, their actions are less about the other person and more about feeding their insatiable need to feel important and in control. They use emotional manipulation to keep their partner emotionally entangled and to conceal their own insecurities. Their cheating isn’t just about physical desire, but about reinforcing their sense of dominance and maintaining the illusion that they’re still in control of their life and image. Recognizing these patterns is essential if you want to protect yourself and understand the real motivations behind a narcissist’s infidelity.
Frequently Asked Questions
Can Narcissists Ever Be Faithful in a Relationship?
Narcissists rarely stay faithful because their emotional vulnerability remains guarded, making genuine connection difficult. Their attachment styles often lead them to seek validation outside the relationship for ego boosts and supply. If a narcissist does attempt fidelity, it’s usually superficial or temporary, as they struggle with true emotional intimacy. You may notice they avoid deep vulnerability, which hampers the development of trust and lasting fidelity.
How Do Narcissists Justify Their Cheating Behavior?
You might notice that narcissists justify their cheating through a moral justification, claiming their actions are deserved or necessary. They often have an entitlement mindset, believing they’re entitled to do what they want without consequences. This mindset allows them to rationalize their behavior, seeing infidelity as a way to maintain their ego, seek new supply, or reaffirm their sense of power, making it easier for them to dismiss the hurt they cause.
Is Cheating a Sign of Deep Narcissistic Personality Disorder?
Cheating can be a storm cloud over someone with deep narcissistic personality disorder, but it’s not the only sign. You might see emotional manipulation and unstable attachment styles flashing like warning lights, revealing underlying issues. Narcissists often cheat to feed their insatiable need for supply and control, yet not everyone who cheats has NPD. It’s a tangled web, and recognizing these signs helps you see beyond surface storms.
Do Narcissists Cheat More Than Non-Narcissists?
Yes, you’re more likely to cheat if you have narcissistic traits, especially since emotional manipulation and seeking supply drive your actions. Your attachment style, often insecure or avoidant, makes it easier to justify infidelity. You may cheat more than non-narcissists because you crave power and novelty, using manipulation to maintain control and boost your ego, even if it damages the trust in your relationships.
Can Narcissists Change Their Cheating Tendencies?
Yes, narcissists can change their cheating tendencies, but it’s unlikely without deep emotional manipulation and a strong desire to grow. They often avoid commitment, making genuine change difficult. If you’re hoping they’ll improve, understand that their patterns stem from a need for supply and power. Real change requires consistent effort, self-awareness, and accountability—something many narcissists resist or manipulate to maintain control in the relationship.
Conclusion
So, next time you wonder why a narcissist cheats, remember it’s often about the endless craving for supply, novelty, and power. Some experts suggest they cheat not just to boost their ego but to maintain control and feel alive. While it’s tempting to see it as a simple choice, the underlying psychology is complex. Understanding this theory might help you see beyond their actions and recognize the deeper needs driving their behavior.